late night ramblings

to catch for a moment
what could be ours for eternity
happiness
passion
two imperfect beings forming one perfect whole.
I am not whole without you.
in that moment, the moment, I know
I say
You leave
taking with you the
happiness
passion
fade.

fade into the dark night
which you left me standing
at the corners
of my sanity
and my soul.

Pain
pleasure
mix freely within me.
the cloud has fallen
I have fallen
into a mist
confusion
hazy smoke of exhaust
and the taste of you in me.

one taste is not enough

surround me
your scent
intoxicating
addictive
it calls me
begs me to touch
when I wish it wasn't
against your will
but I can't change
you mind
and you can't change
me
so we stand
denial facing eyes
that yearn
to love.

love.
you don't listen
when I say the words
so hard to express
for me.
Fear i've never known
almost forced then back down
before they could breach
the safety of
me.

Foolish
to think you
of all people
would believe
such sacred truths
when you've heard all the lies.
my sins lay at your feet
I look a tainted being
through your loyal eyes.

but we all have our demons
we all have our sins.
and I'm willing to forgive
the ones you don't know
you commit.
even though
mine still stand
a letter.
A reminder
every time
you look at me
they shield you from looking
into me.

love.
forgive these tangled words
manifestations of my
unsteady confidence.
my emotions flit within me
and I cry
unsure of the reason
except that you're not near.